This article was written by Bill Easum, long time Pastor and Church consultant. It can be found on the web in other places.

​Throughout all of my consulting ministry, I have seen a disturbing pattern ... most established churches are held hostage by one or two bullies. Some individual or small group of individuals are usually extremely opposed to the church making any radical change, even if it means the change would give the church a chance to thrive once again. I keep hearing pastors say, "If I tried that, I'd lose my job!"

Courageous pastors often ask, "What do I do when one person intimidates the church so much that it is not willing to try something new?" My response is always, "Either convert them, neutralize them, kick them out, or kill them. The Body can not live with cancer." To which someone usually cries, "That's not very Christian!"

My response describes much of the wisdom of both the Old Testament and Jesus. Maturing Christians love so deeply that they will do anything, even not being nice, "for the sake of the Gospel. Jesus was so compassionate toward others that he could not remain quiet when he saw people holding other people in bondage.

The Old Testament story of the wilderness wanderings contains a remarkable account of how Moses responded to a group of people who insisted on keeping the Hebrews bondage to the past .1 A group of people led by Korah came to Moses asking him to relinquish leadership because they wanted to take the Hebrews back to Egypt. Moses responded by falling on his face prostrate before them in prayer. Then he got up and slew all of them. Not very nice, but necessary if they were going to get to Canaan. Moses knew that freedom with God was better than slavery with Pharaoh. The same is true today... freedom to grow in grace is always better than enslavement to the status quo.

Almost every struggling church has at least one dysfunctional bully who goes out of the way to be a big fish in a small pond. Often, that is the primary reason the church is struggling. This person gets his/her sense of self-worth by keeping the church so intimidated, either by their actions or their money, that very little can happen without that person's approval. The sad thing is most of the leaders know that this person is a stumbling block to the church's' future and they will not do anything about it. The church leaders ignore the bully thinking that is the Christian thing to do, and in so doing, assist in the stunted growth or death of the congregation.

For example, I was working with a staff in a large church. The first day I met with the staff the tension was so high I could cut the air with a knife. The staff hardly said a word to one another. The next day when we met the staff laughed and cut up together as if they were one big happy family. As I looked around the table, the only apparent difference was that one staff person was not present. I asked the staff if they sensed the difference I was feeling. They knew exactly what I meant. Finally one of them blurted out, "Jim is not here today. Staff meetings are always better when he's not here." It turned out that Jim was a dysfunctional bully who ran to the personnel committee every time he didn't get his way. Because of him several competent staff members had been fired. To make matters worse, the staff knew that Jim seldom contributed anything to the health and vitality of the church.

I asked the staff if they had confronted Jim with how they felt. Their response was typical for church folks. "That would not be the Christian thing to do. It would hurt him deeply. After all, the church is all he has." Sure, it's all that he has; no one else would put up with him. Who is the most dysfunctional, Jim or the staff?

A church not far from me told its Bishop that it wanted a young pastor. It wasn't long before they got one. One of the first things the young pastor did was ask the Board to change the appearance of the church newspaper. The Board unanimously voted to do so. Four months later, I noticed the newspaper was switched back to its old form. I called the pastor to ask why. His response is a classic. "Most of the Board were present the night we voted. However, one man was out of the country. When he returned to find that a decision had been made in his absence, he demanded that the chairperson immediately call another meeting. At the second meeting, the Board voted unanimously to rescind their previous decision about the newspaper." When I asked why, he replied: "This man always pays off any deficit at the end of year and he wanted the vote changed. The Board was afraid to buck him." The future of that church was held hostage to a bully.

I'm convinced that one of the main sins of the established church is that we have taught ourselves to be nice instead of being Christian. In spite of aspiring to be a disciple of Jesus, we teach that the essence of Christianity is to be nice. Where do we get such a notion? Certainly not from the actions of Jesus.

One of the hallmarks of Jesus's ministry was his constant attack on the status quo. He challenged it every time he could. He even went out of his way to upset the religious bullies of his time. He called them "white sepulchers" and by doing so attacked the very heart of their priesthood based on purity.2 Jesus loved church leaders too much to allow them remain such small persons. When Peter showed his displeasure over the impending death of his Lord, Jesus said to him "Get behind me Satan."3 Jesus loved his disciples too much to let them miss one of the more important lessons of servanthood. Jesus, the man who said, "be compassionate as God is compassionate,"4 had no desire to be nice because ...being nice has nothing to do with being Christian. Being nice is often nothing more than a lack of compassion for people. Let's explore what this means.

At one point, in a holy rage, Jesus entered the Temple with a large, metal-tipped whip and drove out the money changers. As he did, he quipped, "It is written, My house shall be called the house of prayer; but you have made it a den of thieves."5 If we discover why Jesus responded to religious bullies this way, we will also discover why so many church leaders refuse to follow his example.

When Jesus cleansed the temple he was in the Court of the Gentiles. This was the only part of the temple where gentiles were allowed to worship. What ticked Jesus off was that the religious leaders were using the only place gentiles could worship God as the place to sell their wares. What was to be a place of spiritual discovery and worship for the gentiles, was turned into an economic opportunity for the religious leaders. (Sound familiar?) The focus of the religious leaders was on themselves, not the spiritual vitality of the gentiles. So he drove them out.

Therefore, thieves are those who do religious things for their own purpose. So when we are doing things that only benefit those within the church, we become a den of thieves. When we say that we want it this way because it has always been this way, we are a den of thieves. We when focus on only the needs of our members, we are robbing the community of a chance to join us in our journey of faith. Such action is intolerable for people of compassion and love.
Church leaders are robbing people of their spiritual birthright when they allow dysfunctional people to sell their petty wares in the house of God rather than to proclaim release from bondage. We really need to get clear on this problem and do something about. If we really love people, and if we really want them to experience the love of God, then we will not ever allow the bully to rob others of their spiritual birthright. Anyone who knows how family systems work,
knows that the worst thing one can do with dysfunctional people is to give them more attention by giving into their every whim. Instead, tough love has to be applied. The compassionate thing to do is to hold them accountable for their self-centered actions for in doing so they may begin the journey with God.

Jesus shows us what to do with people who do not want to grow spiritually. In training his disciples how to spread the word of God's love, he told the disciples to "shake off the dust of your feet" when they encountered people who did not receive them graciously.6 Jesus loved people too much to let anything slow down the process of setting people free from their bondage whatever it is.

People who would rather be nice than Christian do not love enough. They do not have enough compassion. Instead, they are afraid of hurting someone or of being hurt. Remember, fear is the opposite of love. "Perfect love casts out all fear."7

If we really cared about people, we would not allow anyone to bully others into submission, instead we would want every person to feel free enough to express their hopes and dreams, to stretch their wings, and to reach their God-given potential. If we really loved people, we would not base our decisions on whether or not people would like us for those decisions. Being nice or being liked is never a goal for followers of Jesus.

What does being nice accomplish in the church?

• more dysfunctional people
• fewer spiritual giants
• an intimidated congregation
• an inability to spread the Gospel
• little hope of renewal or growth
• discouraged church leaders.
  
  

Being nice is not what Jesus wants from any of us.

One of the basic lessons I'm learning as a consultant is that before renewal begins in a church or denomination, it is normal that someone has to leave or be denied. Almost every time a dying church attempts to thrive once again, someone tries to bully the leadership out of the attempt. And almost every time, if a turn around is to take place, such persons are lost along the way because they are no longer allowed to get their way. When they can't get their way, they leave. Not even Jesus got through the journey with all of their disciples. Why should we expect too?
This does not mean that we should set out to intimate the bully or to kick people out of the church. It does mean that we care enough about the future of our church not to allow anyone to stifle its ability to liberate people from bondage or victimization. It means that we care enough about the bully that we will not allow the bully to intimate the church because we know the spiritual vitality of both the bully and the church is at stake.

Matthew 18 gives us a formula for dealing with the dysfunctional bully. First, an individual privately confronts the person with what he/she is doing and asks the person to stop. If this doesn't achieve positive results, two or more people are to confront the person. If this does not resolve the matter, the person is to be brought before the entire church. Listen again to the not- so-nice words of Jesus. "And if he shall neglect to hear them, tell it unto the church: but if he neglect to hear the church, let him be unto thee as a heathen man and a publican." In other words, withdraw from that person's presence, or in our case rem ove that person from office! Never, ever, allow such a person to dictate the direction of the church.8
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The next time someone in your church attempts to intimidate or bully the church out of taking a positive step forward, go to God in prayer, and then get out the metal-tipped whip and drive that person out of the church....of course in love.9
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1 Numbers 16

1. 2  Matthew 23:27
2. 3  Matthew 16:23
3. 4  Luke 6:36
4. 5  Matthew 21:13
5. 6  Matthew 10:14
6. 7  I John 4:18
7. 8  Matthew 18:17
8. 9  For more on how to do this, see William M. Easum, Sacred Cows Make Gourmet Burgers
   (Nashville: Abingdon Press, 1995.) 

Pastors, thank you. 

Your presence in the hospital room following a great tragedy brought comfort. 

You spoke truth through challenging words across the restaurant table - waking us up from our spiritual stupor.

You walked with couples through infertility, infidelity and disconnection, you pointed them to Jesus and led them in prayer and confession.

You’ve missed gatherings, parties, events, and sacrificed your weekends to pray and prepare for our Lord’s day gatherings.

You’ve dedicated our children, married our young adults, baptized new believers and buried our older friends.

You led us to pursue the lost, communicate the gospel.

You challenged us to meet the needs of  the orphan, alien, and widow.

You patiently endured congregational criticisms and whisper campaigns.

You’ve lost friends, staff and have endured seasons of loneliness while remaining faithful to our congregation. 

You stayed in this place to be our shepherd when you could have gone elsewhere.

You’ve navigated several election seasons, always leading us with grace and truth - emphasizing, one Lord, one faith, one baptism.

You feel the weight of caring for the flock - 24/7.

Your tear stained face and fervent prayers may not be known but they are felt.

You don’t work for the applause of people - though you often wonder if your prayers, labor and ministry are helping us follow Jesus.

They are.

Thank you Pastor, thank you.

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October brings with it many things, cooler temperatures, Fall colors, the outbreaking of jackets, sweaters and flannel shirts. I love this time of year, if I could craft the weather of heaven I would suggest Fall be the eternal season.

With this time of year comes a month in which, those who make up the group that determine what we celebrate in any given month, suggest we express our appreciation for our Pastors. 

Truthfully, this is a month most pastors kind of dread. Most don’t fully receive words or actions that make them feel appreciated.

On the main, the Pastors in your church don’t do what they do for applause or adulation. 

Truthfully, consider their work. The teaching and preaching of God’s word, the work of discipling, caring, challenging and exhorting you to Christlikeness. 

This means some of what they will say to you and the entire congregation will be corrective or confrontive. Paul declares this in Colossians 1:28-29.  The word warning conveys the idea of exerting pressure on someone’s mind through reasonable and logical appeals. 

Faithful Pastors proclaim Jesus, warn and teach from God’s word.

I appreciate a good warning now and then. My guess is that you do as well, yet there are some warnings which are hard to welcome or receive with joy and thankfulness. 

• Congregation-your lack of regular attendance at worship gatherings not only stunts your spiritual growth-your absence also impacts the larger body in our church.
• Christian-your causal commitment to Christ makes it appear that Christianity is just an additive to life, not the center of a life that honors God and brings blessing.
• Church Member-your passionate political activism (for whatever party) should not outshine your advocacy for biblical mercy, truth, justice and righteous living which honors God and brings true blessing.
• Follower of Jesus-your gossip, controlling and divisive behaviors inside the church are not only destroying the body but our Church’s witness in a world that is full of self-centered critical folks. You demonstrate by your actions a lack of the Fruit of the Spirit.

Few have likely ever said to their Pastor, after he shared a message like or similar to the ones above great personal appreciation.

Does your Pastor preach the entire counsel of God’s word? Does he challenge you to say no to sin and examine your life before God and his Word, aided by the Spirit?  

If he does then it’s time to say thanks.  

Sharing all good things doesn’t just mean a note and gift card to a chain restaurant, a plate of cookies or a gift card to his favorite bookstore. Sharing all good things includes expressing thanks for sermons that challenge, leadership that seeks your maturity and mobilization of teh church for Gospel advance.

Are your Pastors faithfully leading you and your church toward Christian maturity and missional advance?  

Then express your sincere gratitude, be descriptive, tell them how thankful you are that they speak the truth in love and lead well.  

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Deferred maintenance is the practice of postponing maintenance activities such as repairs on both real property and personal property in order to save costs, meet budget funding levels, or realign available budget monies. The failure to perform needed repairs could lead to asset deterioration and ultimately asset impairment. --wikipedia

One of the hallmark signs of a church in trouble is a growing list of facility repairs which are not being addressed. It's easy to understand that choosing to repair an air-conditioner, roof or other major system vs. paying the pastor, keeping Sunday services going, funding missionaries can feel like an impossible choice. 

TICKING TIME BOMBS
WATER: If you talk to any contractor, builder, insurance agent or realtor they will tell you this - water (where it's not supposed to be) is your enemy. The reality is this, every house and building (aside from the newly built) has water issues at some point. Practicing due diligence in tracking down water intrusions and leaks is absolutely mandatory. Pay attention to your life and doctrine, also pay attention to your roof. 

HVAC: These are some of the most costly repairs a church will face. Our forebears worshipped without AC, God bless them-they would tell us they would have loved to have it in their churches. They didn't go without heat. Unless you live in a temperate climate you're gonna need both the ability to warm and cool your gathering spaces. Unfortunately I can count on my own hands and a couple of extra deacon's hands the number of churches who have been taken down by the lack of AC and Heat. Closing off one part of the building, retreating to a smaller area due to HVAC issues is often putting one whole foot + leg into the casket. 

MOLD: Why do churches smell they way they do? I used to think it was all the old accumulated SS literature and plastic flowers and those N'illa wafer cookies handed out in kids sunday school. Most likely it's likely due to the previous mentioned elements (water and lack of climate control) and what happens when heat and water mix over time - Mold. Will you encounter mold? Yes, it's not a matter of if, but when. As well, don't be paralyzed by mold in your facility. Get a contractor, a remediation specialist and attack that mold, remove it, get it gone. I was always amazed at this passage in Leviticus, they took mold seriously.   

PAINT: We are currently in the market for housing, one of the obvious elements that speaks to the overall integrity of a home and the care it has received is the external condition of the structure, of which, the condition of the paint is telling. Peeling or absent paint communicates a message whether it's on the eves of the structure, the siding or the concrete steps leading to the front entrance - paint tells passers by a story about your church. Here's a tip, paint anything that doesn't require a ladder, hire out the rest. 

FEELING OVERWHELMED?
By now you might be feeling that bringing your church facilities up to acceptable standards or even addressing safety and security and climate control issues are fundamentally beyond your capacity, your expertise or your financial reserves. Good, I'm glad you are at this place. Let me ask, what do you think God wants to do? Do you imagine that he wants your church to stay like it is for years? Is He glorified by a dilapidated, broken down and somewhat unusable house of worship? What about a crumbling and derelict facility confirms the power of the gospel? I think we both know that answer - it might help you to actually say it out loud, nothing.

CHOOSING TO DO SOMETHING
Now that we are to the place of honesty and we've said it out loud it's time to act. Unfortunately, ​leaders caught in this dilemma often choose inaction, not intentionally but because they can't see their way out. Here are some practical suggestions on what to do:

1. Make a list of necessary and required repairs - things that have to be addressed to safely and comfortably use the facilities. 

2. Create a list of "desired" repairs - these are the lists of things that you would like to see taken care of and address, non critical to space usage but nice to have complete.

3. Call the Contractors and Count the cost - after you get the lists together, divided into necessary and critical repairs get bids for repairs. Last time I checked, most (not all) bids are free. Too many churches have thousands of dollars in reserves waiting for a "rainy" day. Hey guys, it's raining! It's time to release those funds according to the greatest priority needs, don't let the church crumble and die with money in the bank. 

TRUST GOD AND TAKE ACTION
Some churches have enough means to address their facility issues - great, let's get it done. Other churches after counting the costs realize they do not have the level of reserves and income to survive their circumstances financially. Those in this place face a difficult choice, they are at a crossroads. 

THREE OPTIONS AT THE CROSSROADS
1. Partner with another church - I live in a city where church plants are in desperate need of space. Likely, due to the fact that most of our area in the urban/suburban region is already built out, and facility costs are so high, they won't find space/land/buildings affordable to them under 10 years. But there are countless existing spaces, debt free, occupied by congregations who need what these church plants have: people, momentum, children, money.  The repair costs may be too high for an existing church in decline, but those costs are significantly lower than the purchase price of a comparable facility for the growing church.  Understand this: the repair costs for a deteriorated facility which can be restored and redeemed are substantially lower than the purchase price of the same building in today's market.

2. Donate the building to your Association, State Convention, Multiplying Church: any one of the aforementioned would gladly assist in stewarding your church property toward its intended purpose of being a gospel outpost in the community. They have the energy, knowledge and connections to preserve the ministry in that location, to see your facilities redeemed for God's glory. 

3. Stay where you are as you are: In listing this as an option please don't read this as an endorsement and affirmation that it is a viable choice to do nothing. I write this recalling several churches and their leaders in my mind's eye.  They know the facts, they are fully aware of their predicament and still, they choose to do nothing. Why? I wish I could fully understand, but even if I did, I'm not sure I could change their thinking or their decisions.  While I'm tempted to express a multitude of thoughts, recite a cogent list of arguments, point out the dangers and coming realities related to inaction, doing so to ears that won't hear is futile. 

PLEASE PRAY - FERVENTLY
I know of too many churches who are stuck and stranded in their fears, stymied by the thought of the church as they've known it ending under their watch. I know of well intentioned Trustees, Committee Members and Lay Leaders who have taken the viability of the church upon their shoulders rather than allowing God to care for it and lead it toward the future. They are weary, fearful and protective. Their ire and anger flash at anyone who suggests a future that threatens or suggests it's time to let go and let God.  They stymie, pocket veto and obfuscate all reasonable attempts to bring the church into a better place and toward vitality. They can't be reasoned with, I've tried. That's why I'm asking you to pray earnestly for God to move in them,  move them on or remove them as the roadblocks to Gospel Advance.

Church renewal (read replanting and revitalizing) is a lot like farming. You work hard, wait, work some more and then wait.  In the waiting you may begin to wonder if anything is happening, if any impact is being made, if any true spiritual work is taking place.

The normal measures of success and growth (increased attendance, bigger budgets, more programs and buzz) may remain elusive to you—especially during the early days (read first five years) of your replanting work. Even more elusive - the markers you may desire most - conversions and baptisms. It takes time to reignite and mobilize a declined congregation toward missional living.

Don't ignore the standard measurements of growth but don't be tied to them alone as the primary indicators of success, especially in the early days of your renewal work. To be clear, I’m not advocating for changing the game “where everyone gets a trophy” and you never keep score.  I am suggesting that you begin measuring something many fail to measure--moving your members toward maturity.

Maturation is a funny thing—it occurs internally yet displays itself externally. It develops slowly but appears suddenly.  Its absence and presence are undeniable. In many churches, especially those long in decline it may seem to be entirely absent in the lives of the majority of members. 

Often we've expected longevity of church membership and moral living to equate to spiritual maturity, they often don't. 

Old "Bill" a deacon who's been around for years, served on the search committee and is a Trustee for the church can be as mean as a snake whenever his ideas are contested. He's known to spout un-prayed over and critical opinions at the monthly business meeting, creating shock among the new members, shakes of the head among the old who say; "That's just Old Bill-he gets that way." 

"Gossipy Sue" a senior adult, whose family founded the church, spins her tales as she rocks the youngest of the congregation in the church nursery. Her "sharing" dispirits and disheartens those assigned to serve with her on a Sunday. Worse, when her comments are reported or shared, division is sewn into the fabric of the church family. When conflicts are dissected to discern their source, a good many can be traced back to "Gossipy Sue." 

Are these folks, who have been fixtures and staples of the church mature? By their behaviors just mentioned we'd have to say it's not certain. Are they demonstrating the fruit of the Spirit? Are the embodying Christian love? 

Paul states the goal of his ministry is to present everyone mature in Christ, he then shows us the pattern of ministry he employs to get there.

• Proclamation of the Gospel of Jesus--Him we proclaim
• Skillful Discipling/Pastoring--warning, teaching everyone
• The Approach--with all wisdom
• Fully dependent on God--struggling in ministry with all his energy

What if we started asking those in our church this question: “Are you following Jesus more fully and faithfully now than you were last (week, month, year)? Is your life and are you actions/interactions characterized by Christian love, do they demonstrate the fruit of the Spirit? 

What if we began organizing our efforts and aim at helping our people mature in Christ—and trusting God to give us the strength to do so and leaving the results up to Him.

QUESTIONS FOR REFLECTION

1. Are you taking the long or short view as you develop your ministry score card?

2. Is your focus on results or presenting those you are called to shepherd mature in Christ?

3. Are you working in ministry in your own strength, or in the strength God provides?

Those seeking to catalyze change in a church or organization know that receiving criticism and efforts to sabotage those changes is not only possible, it's probable. Preparing your mind, heart and spirit for that reality is one thing, enduring and leading forward progress in-spite of them is quite another. 

Brother Pastor, Church Leader, Staff member - preparing for the battle before the first salvos are exchanged is not only good advice, it is essential. 

Consider the challenges Nehemiah faced, follow his example, trust God and lead forward.

SABOTAGE STRATEGY 1 - PUBLIC AND OPEN CRITICISM
Critics gonna criticize, often, perhaps loudly, maybe publicly, definitely to those willing to give an ear to their negative vocalizations. In part criticism is a good sign (as long as your not being mean, foolish or exercising poor leadership.)  You can expect people to get angry, mock, question and criticize. 

RESPONSE: Stay at the work

SABOTAGE STRATEGY 2 - PLOTTING CONFLICT
It is sad, but it happens. People antagonistic to changes at a church may exercise bylaw loopholes to gather a crowd (who haven't a clue about what's going on at the church by the way) to vote down initiatives, vote out a pastor and cause chaos. You'd think what with the absence of visitors, baptisms and members sharing the gospel they'd have more important work to do - but no, plotting to keep the church dying and declining-that's the important priority. 
 
RESPONSE: Pray and set up guards

SABOTAGE STRATEGY 3 - ENEMEY INFILTRATION
Not everyone who is with you is for the vision God has given. I've been surprised by betrayals, spies, moles and leakers who took information, manipulated it to their own ends. These close insiders mischaracterize vision, leaders motives and look for ways to kill progress and take out leaders. I wish it weren't so, but sometimes it is. 

RESPONSE: Equip everyone with the truth so that they can defend

SABOTAGE STRATEGY 4 - REQUESTING A "MEETING" 
Let me give you some trusted insight, borne out over a couple of decades of ministry experience. If a recently vocal negative critic wants to "meet" to talk things out, if they aren't leading with repentance, if they have spread gossip and rumors like wildfire, sewn dissension among the congregation and their invitation to convene a conversation isn't absolutely soaked with apologetic humility - don't meet. 

RESPONSE: Focus on your important work

SABOTAGE STRATEGY 5 - THE ANONYMOUS LETTER 
Our seminary and bible professors told us this would happen, the stories prepared our minds cognitively but nothing prepares our hearts for suffering but actually suffering. Typically we hear about such letters only after others have received them. What do the authors intend? Perhaps it's to blanket the congregation with criticism, it could be to plant seeds which would sprout additional opponents. Such letters are meant to strike a blow to the leader, eliminating their voice, silencing them to address the matters raised in the document. 

RESPONSE: Speak the truth, pray.

SABOTAGE STRATEGY 6 - INTIMIDATION
Some critics and their allies attempt to strike a leaders heart with fear. Using hyperbole, exaggeration and over statement they claim things are worse than they actually are, that circumstances are perilous, that the future is dire. Their advice - hide, run, play it safe, back down, stop. 

RESPONSE: Discern the source, pray.

SABOTAGE STRATEGY 7 - SIDE CHANNEL CRITICISM
When leaders are undaunted, when all the strategies employed to get them to stop, change course, lose heart or quit a Saboteur in a last ditch effort to have their way may "flood the zone" with a wide spread last ditch attempt to discredit the work, the leader behind the work and build a coalition of like minded critics among the influential, the common public and the entire community. 

RESPONSE: Disregard

Questions for Reflection

1. What sabotage strategies are you dealing with right now?

2. What can you learn from the example of Nehemiah?  How can you mirror his response? 

3. What help do you need to stay on course - pursuing the vision God has given? 
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